On Indianapolis
Kelli: I would love to stay here, but I want to procreate.
Chris: I could never marry someone who’s tan in January.
Allen: He’s, like, Star Trek smart – you can see him thinking 10 billion different things at once…I’ll bet he can move things with his mind.
Jessica: You can’t get high from chewing a marijuana leaf.
Elise: Why not?
Jessica: I think it has to be hot.
Elise: …but the temperature of your mouth is a steamy 98.6 degrees.
Jessica: Yeah, but that’s not fire. I don’t know what temperature gets hot at, but it’s not from chewing. It’s not fucking fire. That wouldn’t be safe.
Zach: If you come to campus, prepare to be horrified by the fashion choices of our nation’s future middle managers.
